Loving our mother, earth.

EDIT: reading The Upcycle completely re-opened my eyes, and reminded me that....we don't need to live under the fear of "not enough" or, we have to "minimize our use", when we are working within systems that are interconnected, and regenerating - think: Permaculture. If the water in the shower is heated by our Sun, and then used multiple times before re-entering the traditional water treatement system (i.e used again in the sink, or toilette, then pipped out into the yard where you have a natural grey water treatement area, and the water can then be filtered and soak into your food forest....well that is a completely different story than single use, and water heated by non-renewables...)...just sayin ;)

I recently had a conversation with someone about give and takes re: the environment, and they mentioned that they just loved to take long showers and they were not going to give that up,  it was what they did, they loved them, and it was one area they were not willing to "compromise" in..... but there were other areas they did better in, so, they figured, it all balanced out

I've heard this type of thing more than once, and in fact it tends to be a pretty common thing that comes up. In the moment I've always tended to express gratitude for what they did do, and sort of let the other piece go unsure how to truly handle the comment, feeling uneasy about it but not really sure why, or how to articulate it. 

Here are my thoughts......

It makes me think about how disconnected we are and how we still think of these types of things in terms of "compromise", or "giving something up", as seperate than ourselves. That if we want to be turly "enviro", we have to stop the things we enjoy and to stop all of that would be impossible so we must choose a few.

I am definitely pro taking baby steps, changing one thing at a time, then adjusting your lifestyle around that new change, integrating it, then taking the next thing. And, I recognize it can be very daunting to change everything at once....however, I guess I see that as a continual cycle of change - and maybe even something you changed in the beginning, you may get new information and it causes you to change further down the road....this process to me is not static. Yet in the aforementioned conversation ones mind already appears made up.

To me, what's truly going on here is that we are seeing the issue from an outdated paradigm/mindset. In fact, when you truly feel love for someone, it becomes natural to not want to hurt them. Thus, when we truly feel love for our earth, our mother, to hurt her would not feel right.

This is simply what happens when we love someone, and it's actually quite beautiful how it works.

Where you once maybe got enjoyment from an activity, you now don't because in the very depth of your being, you comprehend that it causes harm, and ultimately, that creates a sense of cognitive dissonance inside us - or....in layman's terms, a feeling that doesn't sit quite right. Usually ones behavior is adjusted accordingly, because we have a desire as humans to not feel this sort of uneasy feeling. We naturally want to feel good - makes sense.

And I think we incorrectly assume that we will feel bad, or limited if we cut certain things out because we think of it only from one direction, from one point of view - of what we are "losing", but we don't think about what we gain, and the feeling we feel when we do what's right for what we love. It might seem counter intuitive for now but actually, we feel good once we stop it, not sad that we don't have whatever it is anymore.

When we love someone, we don't make these sorts of calculated responses.

"Suppose she goes into anaphalcctic shock, well there is a hospital she can go to right, and what are the chances she would die? I can probably keep peanuts around?"

"Well, my mom can't breath properly when I spray this hair spray in the air and it makes her wheeze for days, but I really love this hairspray, nothing makes my hair look as good, and well, I make her breakfast on weekend so, it all balances out right?"

We likely wouldn't even think to this point, our emotions, our feelings, our bodies would speak, they would take over before we started to analyze it because the moment we saw we were hurting someone we loved, we would feel that pain inside, and want to change to remove that pain...and the joy derived from that item, or activity would cease to exist the moment we learned it hurt our loved ones.

When did we lose our deep love for our planet, our mother, our only home, and all our fellow inhabitants - that which gave us life? This very life we're living, The life that allows you to read these words on this page and comprehend.

It's not that I have to tell myself a stern"NO" every moment, that actually, I really want to be doing all these things but I "know" they are wrong and harmful to the environment so I stop myself. It's that I literally do not seek any enjoyment from these things anymore, and in many cases it hurts to do the wrong thing....and not from a place of guilt or shame, but from a place of love. 

For example, if I had to throw compost in the garbage (or anything in the garbage) I would feel tense inside. Why? because I know this isn't the place it belongs, and the only reason I'd be doing it is likely because I don't have time to sit down and seek out where it's proper place should be (i.e. search online what to do with random items I have no idea how to recycle,  or find an artist who may want this item to incorporate into art....as some examples).....and while time does feel very real and has very real implications in our current society, nature does not function on that same time scale...but I digress, because now this could lead into the philosophical realm and I'm trying to keep this grounded (for now). 

People often say "oh just throw it out, it won't hurt...." or "you do so much for this planet already, you can slack a little here" it's getting back to the justification type, wrong or right mentality....but it's not about that, it's not about weighing out the good and the bad - it's about listening to what feels right inside.

I have told people, when asked, that I don't think I would enjoy attending large music festivals anymore because I'd bare witness to all the carelessness, wastefullness, litter and general disregard, and this would quite literally, break my heart. And I should add that large music festivals are things that used to bring me a lot of joy (or so I thought). I went to Sasquatch music festival a few years in a row back when I was younger and loved it so much...but I've changed....the joy doesn't come anymore, because what is in the forefront is the pain I feel. And what's different is it's internal now, not just external. Whereas before I noticed the garbage and thought about it...I now feel it. To me this makes sense, we're all deeply interconnected, and when we hurt the one we love, we hurt too.  Now, some would look at that and say "wow, she is really missing out on life, because she's too intense, just relax, be casual about it"... but to me, I don't see it that way.

How do I see it? 

While it's true, I don't derive the same enjoyment out of activities and items that I once used to, this is only unfortunate if we stop right there. When you take it a step further you see that while  I may not have "fun" like the mainstream world has fun right now, I have ventured down a path that brings me many joyful moments, and honestly they feel more full of joy because I don't have to deny any part of myself while doing them (the part that would know deep down this is wasteful, or wrong, or harmful to mother nature)....it's pure bliss.

So what I wonder is..... where did the love go and how do we get it again? How does love form?